A Smattering of Dad Jokes to Make Your Day Better

Admit it. There’s a secret part in all of us that adores what are affectionately, and somewhat mockingly, called “Dad Jokes.” Dad jokes are often comprised of cheesy puns that seamlessly combine wit and tackiness. They are usually very brief and force you to pause for a moment to grasp their full meaning. The end product? A joke that makes you simultaneously cringe and chuckle. Whether or not you’re having a less-than-ideal day, these jokes will at least bring a smile (if a small one) to your face. Dads around the world, these are for you.


  1. What do you call a flying bagel?

A plain bagel.

  1. Where do you find a dog with no legs?

Right where you left it.

  1. A ham sandwich walks into a bar and orders a beer.

The bartender says, “Sorry, we don’t serve food here.”

  1. Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl use the bathroom?

Because the “p” is silent.

  1. Want to hear a joke about paper?

Nevermind, it’s tearable.

  1. How many apples grow on a tree?

All of them.

  1. Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in France?

There was nothing left but de Brie.

  1. The graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.

  1. What do you call a fake noodle?

An “impasta.”

  1. I was surprised to find out that I’m color blind.

It really came out of the purple.


If any of these made you laugh, you know you owe something to a Dad in your life for inundating your childhood with terrible jokes. They might be cheesy, but their nostalgia and cleverness outweighs their tacky nature any day. Thanks, Dads.